Can you believe it's been a year since Carolina was born?! It seriously went by in a flash. We are so thankful for her life and she is definitely one of the best surprises of my life (I'm going to go ahead and say the best surprise of my life!).
It's funny to celebrate a one-year-old's birthday because it's not like she has any idea that it's her birthday or can even conceptualize a birthday. But we couldn't let the day go by without doing anything. I try to be careful about sugar so I didn't want to give her something sugary to celebrate since we'll be doing that today at her joint birthday party with Maggie. So I bought her a freeze-dried fruit snack at Whole Foods (big whoopee, right?) and then we went to the playground with her and I pushed her on the swing for a half an hour. It's definitely her favorite thing to do. I made an 11-second video of her on the swing on that day because her giggle is just infectious. Please ignore the idiotic sounding person in the background saying "Wheeee!" That would be me, trying to make her laugh.
Not everyone realizes this (I don't think I've blogged about it before) but Carolina strangely was born on her big sister, Elle's birthday. Elle would have turned seven this year on the same day Carolina turned one. I can't believe they share a birthday. Isn't that crazy? I hope that it will make Carolina feel special and connected to her sister but not sad or upset in any way. Every year we have our special things we do to celebrate Elle and now that Carolina shares her birthday we've adjusted some of them. This year was easy because Carolina had no idea, but eventually she will and I don't want her to feel bummed or not celebrated. Both girls are equally important to me but here on earth I think it's more important for Carolina to feel celebrated and loved. I don't think Elle would mind one bit. Luckily we have another birthday or maybe two before Carolina knows about birthdays and about Elle, so we have some time to figure it out. Anyway, this was one of our happiest October 24ths ever and Carolina is hugely responsible for that. In a way, her being born on October 24 has redeemed that day for us. We still love and miss Elle so much and wish she were here, but it's so nice having someone/something to be totally joyful about on that day. And I'd like to take this time to mention that this world is broken and that is the only explanation for something so tragic and painful as losing a child. Happily, my hope is in Jesus, and a time is coming when all things will be made perfect.
Revelation 21:4
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.
I Thessalonians 4:18
But we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, about those who have died, so that you may not grieve like other people who have no hope.
3 comments:
I cried reading this, great post. We miss Elle too, miss knowing her. It's so special that Carolina was born on the same day, I hope it will, as you said, make C feel special that she shares that day with her sister!
And I cracked up at the video, but mostly at your "weeee!" haha, I kept playing it over and over again and Kevin was like, what are you watching? I'm still chuckling :)
Courtney,
Watched the video earlier today, just read the entire post. Happy birthday to Caro, happy birthday to Elle. Crying at my desk here at work, will never forget those days 7 years ago. Great words.
Love you guys,
Blake
Courtney, you have moved me to tears with your precious words about Elle and Carolina. How we miss Elle but I love the place you drew us to with your observation that one of the sweet gifts of Carolina is the redemption of October 24 for us all.
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